Girl Power

The mainstream media consistently slams women for their contributions to society. From Madison Ave to D.C. to Hollywood, scathing critiques of women constantly abound dismissing the merits of female scholars (Harvard), presidential candidates (Hillary Clinton), comedians (Vanity Fair) and the female moviegoing public (Warner Bros) and their sisters behind the camera (LA Times).

While I am not naïve that a double standard exists in the professional world, it genuinely beguiles me. Never in my life have I been made to feel I was inferior to a man (except in junior high dodge ball). Like the popular clique in high school, we women have been victim to the jealous hateration all along, but have we let it stop us? I don't think so, girlfriend.

The truth of the matter is strong feminity is threatening to less ambitious people, not exclusively men. I, myself, have experienced this in the workforce but I've never let it deter me or convince me to give up. Citing Ms. Clinton's noted mentor and fellow First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt's famous words, truly "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

Those in authoritarian positions including the then-President of Havard University Lawrence H. Summers, Jeff Robinov at Warner Bros. and well-respected journalists across the board at top news institutions including The Los Angeles Times and Vanity Fair have publicly discussed, criticized and in worst case scenarios lambasted women's achievements or advances in the public sphere; most often blaming women for their ambition or lack thereof citing biology and womens "innate [in]ability" to match their masculine counterparts, as Summers did.

When they do match or surpass men's expectations, they are often branded as "bitches" or "dykes" or criticized for their looks. Remind yourself, if you will, of how cheerful people were when Martha Stewart, deemed the "domestic diva" was incarcerated for insider stock trading. While such a crime is seriously prosecuted in a court of law, particularly when a certain prostitute-hungry Governor ran Gotham, few have taken the heat as hard as Martha. But she didn't get out of the kitchen. She came back stronger than ever like her Viking brand appliances.

I did, in fact, work on her talk show "Martha" when it debuted on NBC. I did get to work very closely with her rehearsing the segments for her show as an improvisational partner. It was truly one of the most memorable events of my professional life but it was only a footnote. Whenever I tell people of this story, the first question I get is, "Was she a bitch?" Actually, no, she wasn't. She was quite funny.

I began to understand that despite her public image as a perfectionist, she does have a sense of humor and humility and she does expect a certain level of professionalism. Don't we all? In school, I remember being told never to sign my name onto something unless I could stand behind and fully support my words. I admit I have turned in lackluster school assignments and haven't always been prepared for every challenge that came my way but I have learned to be a fighter and I couldn't see it any other way.

Since moving to Los Angeles a year ago, I have encountered many challenges and opportunities to rise to the occasion. I have landed(what could become) a dream job and started working on my writing and comedy goals and must not settle for less than perfection. I will have to fight for it, just like everyone else.

I just hope that our public role models including Hillary Clinton will stay on for the duration of their campaigns. The truth is, we do need more female role models from the classroom to the Oval Office to the silver screen. We already have the tools, we just have to make it happen for ourselves. Zig-a-zig ah!

What Happens in Vegas

...stays in Vegas. But have you ever noticed nothing good ever comes from that expression? It's not exactly cool realizing the hooker you just hired to give you a BJ is actually a man. What, like that's never happened to you? Brett Ratner felt it was so universally experienced that he included it in Rush Hour: 3 based on his experiences growing up in Miami as the son of a Cuban-born socialite. Ok, ok so I may not be haggling street walkers to sip bacardi at the afterparty at the Holiday Inn (say what) but I do happen to seek the best that life has to offer (again, I am not Brett Ratner- thank god!); however, I did decline an invitation to join my friends in Vegas this weekend. Why? I must be crazy, right? No, just smart. About some things, at least.

We all take gambles in our everyday life: joining our friends at a Mediterranean restaurant even though we'd much rather have a good old fashioned Whopper; buying those to-die-for Manolos that cost $200 (ok fine, $600) too much that are a half size too small just to prove we can run with Carrie & Co; to going out with that hot Italian guy who resembles DeNiro in his Johnny Boy days who makes our heart skip a beat, even though he only texts us at an hour only Hillary would be up waiting to respond to, as her campaign promised. But, why play it safe?

I hate to reveal the double-cross but the MacGuffin is clear for all to see. No matter where you come from or which exciting city you relocate to, it is all just an illusion. Without hard work, gusto, an unbreakable spirit and a discerning eye (Ratner, I look in your general direction), bad choices are far too often made. While I made the *smart* decision to skip out on gallivanting around Dirty Vegas with the money I should be spending on bills while waiting for my next job to come (hint, hint), I made the rather stupid decision to instead see What Happens in Vegas .

While admittedly I had no intention of seeing this piece of rubbish, I must confess I was overserved a few sips too many at Ugo's Italian Restaurant in Culver City before realizing I should "sober up" at the adjacent cinema. I know, I can't stay away from those damned Italians! They are my weakness but they have the best food on the planet. When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's amore! Am I right or what? Fuhgettaboutit. My fecockta excuses are no use. I blame Tori Spelling and those menacing Culver City Red Feathers!



In any event, let's just say Cameron D. does not exactly fit the mold of an overworked-undersexed NYSE broker desperate to make a new life for herself after her dorkus Wall Street boyfriend Jason Sudeikis leaves her high and dry. I also didn't exactly buy Ashton "I need MILF money" Kutcher as the blue-collar construction worker from over the bridge who was best friends with average joes Rob Corddry (member of the geek squad pledging to belong in Old School ) and Zach Galifianakis (self-proclaimed sex symbol to bears aka "over-weight, bearded gay guys”). I LOVE Rob and Zach but they are definitely not fedora-carrying members of Ashton's rat pack part deux (Remember when Ashton, JT and Diddy used to parade around as such before Ashton went for Moore?) Besides, I'm sure all that sawdust would ruin his manicure anyway. And I don't even want to ruin the "surprise" ending with its sappy, over the top, trite dialogue accompanied by whistful music photographed beside a lighthouse in Fire Island. Yeah, it was pretty gay.

All things considered, I did laugh my ass off. And not always unintentionally as I would in a Vin Diesel movie (I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt, Ratner. Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan are right up there with Bogey and Bacall in the showmance department).

Anyhow, I'm hedging my bets double feature style ditching traditional Hollywood fare for Croatia's Academy Awards submission "Armin" about an accordian-playing Bosnian boy cajoled into acting by his overbearing stage father, followed by Harmony Korine's latest "Mister Lonely" co-starring Diego Luna and Samantha Morton as Michael Jackson and Marilyn Monroe impersonators seeking a better life in...Scotland. I can't make this stuff up, folks, but I wouldn't miss it for the world. At least I saved the $10.50 to go to the movies. I'm betting one of these makes up for what didn't happen in Vegas.